Lettuce sucks!

NOTICE: this story is fiction.

BANG!! “HAW HAW HAW!” I laughed to myself as the bullets flew out the window.

Not just any bullets, BULLETS FILLED WITH LETTUCE!! That’s right, I’m using a double barreled
shotgun to shoot my vegetables out the window. Why? I will tell you, but don’t tell my parents!

It all started last week when my mother put lettuce on my dinner plate. I HATED this food, if you
could call it that. Anyways, I knew I had to get rid of the rotten garbage somehow, and I had a plan.

I asked my dad if I could use the bathroom. Reluctantly, he said yes. “WOOHOO!” I said to myself
quietly before shoving the stuff into my jumper pocket and waddled off to the laboratory.

I opened the toilet seat but then remembered, the flushing thing was broken! I had to do something,
“Aha!” I thought to myself, I knew there was a double barreled shotgun in the garage.
I snuck in, thook the metal balls out of the bullets, put in the lettuce, and loaded the gun.